How To Sexually Reset Your Brain From a Porn Addiction
Porn addiction can deeply impact your brain, altering your sexual responses and making it difficult to enjoy healthy, intimate relationships. The good news is that you can rewire your brain and regain control. In this article, we’ll explore effective strategies to reset your brain from porn addiction and help you rediscover a healthier, more fulfilling sex life.
Can Your Brain Recover From Porn Addiction?
The human brain is a complex machine that can be rewired through various means, intentionally and unintentionally. So no matter how long you may have been struggling with pornography, even if it's been years, it doesn't have to be forever.
You’ve probably heard the common little phrase “pornography rewires your brain.” You may have experienced some of the harmful effects of this porn “rewiring” in your life. But here’s a secret: everything we do shapes the pathways in our brains. The human brain is an incredibly dynamic, changing organ, and so if you feel like your brain and your sexuality have been reset in a negative by pornography, there are ways to change it back to be healthy again!
There are many small, intentional changes you can make that will positively reshape your brain, and we’ll dive into them in this article. If you're in need of more help and want a full sexual brain reset program to help you in this journey, follow this link to get a personalized plan and private group community.
{{CTA}}
What Is Porn Addiction?
Research indicates that excessive pornography use may lead to sexually compulsive behaviors and may result in the development of sexual addiction. Viewing pornography can result in vicious type of addictive cycle.
This cycle begins with a craving phase, which is only satisfied once you get to watch porn. Then, sadly, guilt and shame can follow. Then the cycle repeats all over again. Experiencing uncontrollable urges to watch porn can be just as problematic for many people as other types of addictions.
Studies comparing the brains of people who compulsively watch porn with those addicted to drugs or alcohol have had mixed results. However, a 2013 study from researchers at the University of Leicester, UK, suggests that a propensity towards pornography might be even more of a compulsive behavior than addictive substances.
In that study (which examined porn’s addictive nature) subjects who consumed a large amount of pornography showed an increased reaction in their brains when presented with pornographic material. The changes in certain areas of their brains were similar to that observed in those addicted to alcohol or drugs.
Another 2015 study found that believing you are addicted to pornography, rather than simply using it, was a more significant reason for associated distress and anxiety. In other words, though the addiction itself can certainly cause problems, the negative emotions you feel believing you have a shameful addiction can be even more harmful.
Those who develop this kind of addiction tend to spend more and more time using pornography, often moving on to more extreme content over time. If you’ve been trapped in this cycle and are ready to get out, find recovery help here!
How Does Pornography Affect Your Brain?
With the availability of the internet, access to pornography is easier than ever. Explicit videos and photos are mere clicks away and often right in the palms of our hands. This is a major reason why many people find porn addiction to be even more difficult to break free from than other types of addictions.
It’s no surprise that studies show most of us have viewed internet porn at least once. Some of us, however, can’t seem to stop. What is different about those who struggle with viewing porn? How does porn affect your brain?
Regardless of your unique situation and struggle, the chronic overuse of internet pornography causes major changes in the brain. Many studies suggest that there are measurable differences in the brains of those who view a lot of pornography, indicating a potentially damaging effect over time.
Quit Pornography for Good
In order to allow your brain to experience a full reset, you’ll need to develop a strategy to quit porn for good. We know this is much harder than it sounds, but it isn’t impossible. If you’ve been struggling with pornography for many years and been unable to quit, Relay’s revolutionary recovery program is the tool you need.
Relay helps you reconnect with yourself and others by combining behavioral psychology, data-driven insights, and team support. It creates a safe space to find group-based accountability, breaking the shame and stigma often associated with sexual habits and addiction. Through personalized reflections, Relay guides you to explore the emotional triggers behind your urges. You can easily track and share your progress, allowing our data-driven AI to identify patterns and use them to help you prevent relapses. Unlike many other programs, we know there is no one-size-fits-all solution. Relay helps you create a plan unique to your situation, focusing on what matters most to you. If you’re ready see your life (and your brain!) change for the better and finally leave pornography behind, get started here!
8 Steps To Reset Your Brain From a Porn Addiction
Now, let’s get right down to it. How can you reset your brain after years of watching porn? You may think that, at this point, there’s no going back. You may even wonder if you could ever stop watching porn completely.
We know that porn rewires the pathways in the brain and causes us to see sex differently, but is there hope for true change? Yes! The best way to think of your brain is just like any other body part: with time and proper attention, it will heal. Here are 8 steps you can take to rewire your brain:
1. Cut Out All Porn
Most advice in other addiction forums is that quitting cold turkey is dangerous. But this is not the case with porn! It’s very hard to sexually reset your brain after a pornography addiction if you’re still actively consuming explicit material. So hit the brakes in terms of watching porn. It might be tricky, but, with the right resources, you can do it.
2. Give Your Brain a Full Rest
One thing that will help you to reboot your brain is to take a complete break from all sexually explicit material, not just porn. In the same way that an alcoholic could be triggered by walking into a bar, you're only making it harder on yourself if you're browing dating apps, scrolling Instagram, watching sex scenes in movies, wandering the shadier parts of Reddit, or reading erotic literature.
Instead of just white-knuckling the steering wheel trying not to do something, it’s much more effective to fill your head with more positive things that simply won’t allow you time to lapse back into porn and other sexually explicit material.
3. Address Your Triggers
Learn to figure out your triggers, and remember that you don’t have to be perfect! While masturbation or having sex with your partner may not be inherently unhealthy for you, if it makes you crave porn, maybe you need to take a break from that too.
Remember that your focus is on giving up porn and retraining your brain so you can have a normal sex life. Be mindful about the common situations or times of day where you are usually at risk of feeling the urge to watch porn, and make a plan to avoid those environments. Boundaries are essential!
{{CTA_PDF}}
4. Find a Therapist
It’s uncomfortable to talk about issues that are sexual in nature with another person, but there is an entire subset of therapists trained in helping individuals overcome pornography and masturbation. These therapists are called Certified Sex Addiction Therapists, or CSATs.
A good therapist can help you use Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) or other evidence-based approaches to identify your triggers and work to avoid them—or at least cope with them better—when they arise. If you aren’t ready to meet with a therapists face-to-face (or if that isn’t in the budget for you right now), you should really consider looking into Relay’s porn recovery program to learn from leading therapists who specialize in pornography addiction.
5. Join a Support Group
A support group is a wonderful resource for anyone who needs help with addiction. They are just what they sound like: a way to find support from others. The beauty of a support group is that there’s no judgment. Everyone is going through some iteration of the same thing.
The same internet that got you into trouble could help you find online support groups. Or, talk to your therapist or doctor about how to find a local group. If you don’t like it immediately, try sticking it out for a couple of meetings, or you can find another one. Sometimes you need the right group for it to work (hint - people LOVE the group structure in Relay's online program).
6. Do a Screen Fast
Depending on your career, you may be able to take a break from screens altogether. Doing so could be a huge help to rewiring your brain. Remember that your recovery is not just about porn. It’s also about reversing addiction-related brain changes and sexual conditioning.
This might mean taking a break even from the objects that you associate with porn, such as your cell phone and your laptop. As always, instead of just giving something up and allowing a vacuum to exist where it was, fill it with something healthier!
7. Find an Active Hobby
Remind your brain how it feels to produce dopamine through other, more positive, means. You don’t need to avoid all pleasurable, dopamine-inducing activities! In fact, the opposite is true. In order to sexually reset your brain, you need to replace your addiction with as much enjoyment as possible; just make it the non-porn kind.
Prioritize activities that will allow you to connect with your partner, friends, and loved ones. Get exercise, socialize, meditate, or learn a new skill. These things can make you happier, and recognize that you can survive without porn. Stopping pornography is much less about willpower and far more about crafting a healthier life overall.
8. Don’t Fantasize
It might sound a little strange, but believe it or not, fantasizing about porn is almost the same as watching it, as far as the brain is concerned. The brain doesn’t differentiate between types of porn or types of fantasy; it only knows what’s happening in terms of brain chemicals.
If you want to lead a sexually healthy and fulfilling life, it’s key to keep your sexuality a part of real life, not a fantasy world of thoughts spinning around inside your head. Be mindful of your thoughts and start to notice the occasions where your eyes want to wander and scan. If that feels challenging, this could be a great thing to work on with your therapist or Relay group!
9. Get Back to Real Sex (Maybe)
For some, a temporary break from orgasm, self-induced or otherwise, can help them to remember what sex is about: real, intimate connection between two people. In a safe and loving relationship, sexual contact with your partner can be beneficial in helping you to sexually reset your brain, especially if you’re able to allow things to be less than perfect, and focus on connecting with and caring for your partner. The only caveat is that you can’t allow yourself to think about porn while you do this. Stay present and be fully open with your partner. Many people tend to reduce the frequency of orgasms at the beginning of their recovery, so be honest with yourself and remember that the steps to healing may not always feel gratifying or comfortable.
10. Remember: Progress, Not Perfection
The importance of a healthy mindset in addiction recovery cannot be overstated. You cannot have an all-or-nothing mindset and allow yourself to feel defeated by every little setback. Perhaps you break down and watch porn after a long day. You can be honest about this being a setback, but it doesn’t mean that you are now hopeless and bound to a life of endless porn addiction. Instead, focus on seeing this “relapse” as a chance to learn more about your triggers so you can be more prepared going forward.
You may even notice that if you do go back and watch porn again, it isn’t as satisfying as it once was. That’s a victory! Celebrate the little things, even if they feel trivial. Reinforcing positive gains, no matter how small they may seem, is a very critical step to helping re-train your brain.
Conclusion
Rewiring your brain and resetting yourself sexually is absolutely possible—it just takes some time, discipline, and often outside support. Many people who try to stop watching porn try to simply cut it out cold turkey and hope for the best, but, in reality, you are going to need a robust, comprehensive plan.
Remember what real intimacy is all about, and you'll be able to grow past the false pleasure and empty promises of the fake stuff online. Your brain can and will recover if you give it the time and space it needs.
{{CTA}}
Sources:
Watching pornography rewires the brain to a more juvenile state | Neuroscience News
Is pornography addictive? | APA
Rebooting Basics | Your Brain On Porn
How to Identify and Treat a Pornography Addiction | Healthline
Find Effective, Evidence-Based Treatment in the Relay Program for Compulsive Pornography or Masturbation
There is help available to you if you or a loved one has a physical dependence or psychological dependence on pornography, masturbation, or sex. These urges and compulsive behaviors can control your life, but you can take back control. Relay's addiction recovery program provides a comprehensive, outpatient approach to behavioral change - at home, at your own pace. To each new program member, we provide a personalized recovery plan, a peer support group, progress tracking, journaling, and intelligent insights about your behavior patterns, all within a simple and secure mobile app Our proven approach helps program members achieve the best chance at long-term recovery without the time or expense of rehab or therapy. Try the Relay program for free here; if you need help as you get set up, contact us now at hello@joinrelay.app.
A better way to recovery, right in your pocket.
Don't miss these posts:
Though quitting porn is a long and challenging journey, this article can give you the pointers you need to get started on the right track.
If you're ready to let go of porn for good, this article will tell you how.
No Porn November is an exciting way to take a stand against porn. Read this article for the rules of the month, and advice on how to follow them!