The Best Advice for Recovering From a Porn Addiction

If you are embarking on a recovery journey to free yourself from pornography addiction, you will probably hear a lot of advice along the way, not all of it helpful or reliable.

We want to join the ranks of those who will offer you advice as you try to kick your porn addiction for good. Given the availability of internet pornography, it’s no surprise that porn users are struggling more than ever with compulsive sexual behaviors.

Let’s dive into the specifics of porn addiction and some of our best advice for recovering.

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Why Is Pornography so Addictive?

The majority of mental health experts are divided over whether pornography addiction (different from sex addiction) is a legitimate diagnosis, since it doesn't appear in the DSM-5 (the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders). Despite this, anyone with problematic porn use can agree that it is a habit that’s hard to break.

There is an actual scientific reason why pornography is so addictive, and it has to do with brain chemistry. Some classify porn consumption as a compulsion, not an addiction. A compulsion is typically done to relieve stress or anxiety, while an addiction involves receiving a reward from an action or substance.

In either case, when we are presented with something that brings us pleasure or happiness, our brains get a hit of dopamine. If we are always presenting ourselves with these dopamine opportunities at similar times of the day, our brains come to expect it, and we can actually become agitated if we don’t get it.

Whether you call it a behavioral addiction, a compulsion, or something else altogether, you have decided to quit because it is affecting your life negatively (Sounds like an addictive behavior to us, but who are we to judge?).

But how does porn negatively affect you?

While porn has some benefits, watching it to the point where it’s a behavioral addiction can have negative effects. For instance, internet porn can lead to porn-induced erectile dysfunction, unrealistic or unhealthy fetishes, and withdrawal symptoms. Additionally, compulsive behavior could cause someone to develop compulsive masturbation habits.

Compulsive pornography viewing can also cause individuals to disconnect from or fail to be aroused by their current sex life and relationships, which can contribute to low self-esteem. This can then lead to substance abuse if the porn habit continues over an extended period.

What Is Some Advice for Recovering From a Pornography Addiction?

While there is no foolproof method of kicking any addiction, we have some tips to help you move on from porn addiction. Check out our addiction recovery advice and make it work for you!

Don’t Just Refuse, Replace

Trying to quit any addiction cold turkey is one of the most difficult things you can do. In the recovery scene, people call it “white knuckling.” In other words, hang on for dear life and hope you can make it.

It is difficult, unpleasant, and usually, it doesn’t work. Instead of just denying yourself something you aren’t supposed to do, you should replace it with something that is enjoyable and less destructive.

Replacing your addiction with a positive, productive hobby or activity will be far less painful. Since pornography use is of a physical nature, it’s helpful to replace it with a physical activity.

Feel a craving? Do 20 crunches. Another urge coming on? Go for a jog. Bonus: You might even lose a few pounds!

Get an Accountability Partner

Talking to someone about this problem might be the last thing you want to do, but it can also be the most helpful. The root of addiction is guilt and shame, so bringing it up to a loved one can be incredibly difficult. However, you will be surprised at how much support you will receive.

Admitting your addiction is the first step of any recovery program, and just making that step will make you feel like you have gotten the weight of the world off your shoulders. Having someone to talk to about your cravings and struggles will help in ways you can’t duplicate with any other strategy.

Block Out the Negative, Bring in the Positive

Make life a little easier for yourself: install a porn blocker on your laptop and cell phone to prevent viewing porn. If you’ve been a habitual viewer for some time now, you are might be getting suggestive ads popping up on the sidebar of your browser or in your social media feeds. Some programs can block these ads as well.

We know people who have installed programs on their internet browsers that block out all images completely! This may be a little overkill, but do what you’ve gotta do.

In the name of our first tip about replacement, you might consider having some inspirational websites up in your bookmarks bar. Your Brain On Porn is a website that links an impressive number of studies with information about how pornography affects the brain.

Of course, the Relay App site is always there to help too. If you have the app on your phone, keep it front and center in the middle of your screen.

Try a One Day Screen Fast

Think of it as a reset. If you are early in your recovery, try to stop using screens altogether for one whole day. At first, you might think, “No big deal — I can do that!” And you sure can. But don’t forget all the places where you use screens in your everyday life: computers, phones, TV, etc.

What’s the point? Detaching from the screens can make you realize how reliant we are on them.

So much screen technology is absolutely meant to be addictive. By design, you want to pick up your phone at every red light. A one-day fast can help you free and reset your brain and remember that there are other ways to be satisfied.

Find a Community

As we said before, guilt and shame are at the forefront of addiction. Sometimes you need to talk to people who understand exactly what you are going through. This is where a recovery community comes in.

Support groups are one of the best ways to band together with people with the same issues you have. Not only is it helpful to know that you are not alone, but it’s important to get things off of your chest sometimes.

You can even try online support groups and social media forums if you're not fasting from screens. There are so many communities available to you, and since the Covid-19 pandemic, more than ever have popped up worldwide. This convenience makes it possible for you to attend a support group at almost any time of day.

You may also benefit from cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). Individual therapy can help identify patterns that may have caused the compulsive porn viewership or sexual addiction and can help you get on track toward rewiring your brain and rebooting your capacity for healthy relationships and sex.

Quit Completely

This may sound like an obvious tip, but you really do need to stop completely. Very few addicts can actually control a habit and “cut down” to consuming a reasonable amount. Some call the cutting down technique “Harm Reduction,” and it just doesn’t work for most compulsive behaviors.

By the time your habit has developed into a full-blown addiction or compulsion, you have formed neural pathways that are incredibly difficult to be changed but incredibly easy to be reignited by the right spark.

It’s just too easy to click on a link that will take you back down the same path you were on before. Instead of indulging occasionally (again, this doesn’t work!), be aware of your triggers and seek to avoid them. You will have to relearn how to use devices without looking at porn, which will all be a challenge.

Practice Mindfulness Every Single Day

There is a reason why meditation is a vital part of any recovery process: it works! Many people have the incorrect assumption that when you meditate, you have to completely clear your mind and sit in absolute stillness and silence. This is far from the truth.

If your mind can’t be still, that’s okay. When practicing mindful meditation, you just need to think about what comes up in your mind when you attempt to sit still and quiet your brain. Focus on deep breathing and remember that meditation has been shown to help with stress, anxiety, cravings, and a laundry list of other ailments.

Take Care of Yourself in Other Ways

One of the most important all-encompassing tips we can offer is to start taking care of yourself in other ways. Don’t focus solely on managing your addiction. It might start that way, but start thinking of yourself as a real, healthy, thriving person. What would that person do?

That thriving person would probably go to the doctor for a yearly physical. That person would find a good therapist. That person would try to exercise three to four times a week. Keep reminding yourself that you are worth it. Everything else will fall into place.

Conclusion

There’s no doubt that porn is addictive. A multimillion-dollar industry depends on your addicted brain to keep its profits up. You can overcome this addiction, though.

Take a break from the screens, focus on the positive, stay mindful, and don’t be afraid to seek the help you need. You can heal, and you are worth healing and love.

Sources:

Porn Addiction: Causes, Signs, Treatments, and More | PsyCom

How to Identify and Treat a Pornography Addiction | Healthline

What Happens in Sex/Porn Addiction Rehab? | In The Rooms